I fell in love tonight!  I have been doing a David Bible study at Anna McClure's church and the more time I spend seeking His face through His interactions with a man after His own heart, the more I want to spend time watching God love on David.  The awesome thing is that He loves me like that too.  I have learned a lot about the nature of God through this Bible study, which is the goal because you are after a change of heart as the purpose of the study.  I definitely need one too!!

  

Today, in my studying, I read in the last part of 1 Samuel 19 that when Saul sent men to kill David, God unloaded His Spirit on them and they started prophesying and couldn't kill him.  He didn't do this with just one set of men though, he did it with three rounds of men.  Then Saul came himself and the same thing happened to him.  I found this amazing.  Kelli, Mike and I have been talking a lot about the love of God and I know God has been revealing to me His love by just dumping His affections on me.  (Its so awesome!).  Just ask Him how much He loves you..He will show you.  But I found the fact that God fought these men that were trying to harm His chosen one by pouring out His Spirit on them mind blowing.  See, God had the ability to squash them and in my fleshly mind, that is what I thought probably would have happened had I been in control but He is God!! His ways are perfect!  Instead, He chooses to pour out the Holy Spirit on them..what could be more perfect than that? Just think about what kind of God we serve, that would choose to bless the ones that is against His guy over harm them!! It is humbling to know the love of God when we don't deserve it.  What grace!!

Tonight, I went to Anna's church for the Bible study and Beth Moore turned us toward Psalm 62. What a blessing!  She said it would be a good Scripture to memorize because it would be so freeing from bondage if you could repeat it every morning.  I totally agree...now, I am about to take on something that I have never done.  I am going to memorize the whole content of Psalm 62.  I have never memorized a chapter before and while I was sitting there thinking about doing it so I could just carry it in my heart, I thought, "I can't do that!"  Well, the Holy Spirit reminded me that I couldn't but He could!  I look at this Scripture with adoration.  It starts out by saying, "My soul finds rest in God alone;".  She went on to talk about that you would have to have been a time of very painful circumstances to grasp the concept of "God alone".  I know "God alone".  There is a lot more awesomeness down through those verses but the next part that grasped my attention with an iron fist was "My salvation and my honor depend on God."  She defined salvation as "deliverance".  A few months ago, I had a revelation that I had been "delivered" by God.  That was profound to me.  The God of the Universe, the Almighty God, the God that sent His Son to Earth as a sacrifice delivered ME!  Not as a collective effort.  Not because I deserved it.  Not because I even knew to ask totally what to be "delivered" from but because He is God and He knows what we need regardless of the fact we are clueless.  I didn't go to Him and say, "God, I have this and this and if you could work on this over here.." Instead, I said, "God, save me" and He knew what from and did.  She went on to talk about our "honor" depending on God.  The dictionary defines honor as "honesty, fairness and integrity in one's beliefs or actions" and then goes on to say, "high respect, as for worth, merit or rank".  Before Christ delivered me, I was worth nothing because I didn't know honesty, fairness or integrity.  "You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the One who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world." 1 John 4:4. I have honor because He, living inside of me, has given me worth by transforming my life to be modeled after His image! Praise God!!

WHAMM! GLORY!

 

You ever have one of those days that you're just bee-bopping around and Whamm! Extra dumping of the glory of God? Wellll...let me just tell you, today was one of those days.. If you know God, you are familiar that He puts something big on your heart until you either learn it or He rids you of it.  Well, the big thing in my life lately has been "love".  He has shown me how much He loves me in different circumstances and pretty much says, "Watch this, I am fixing to love on you and just blow you away with it!"  Now, I have known since walking with Him that Jesus loves me and He has revealed it before but through turning my heart to love on other people with mercy and grace, He has shown me that the love He has for us is alive and real.  Well, today I went to church and heard Kelli and Mike talk about their mission trip.  I just was blessed by it so much because she is my sidekick and to see how the Lord has moved in her life and the "shine" she has on her face, which could only be the result of the glory of God, just tickles my soul! Then we went to their reception and spent the afternoon lazing around until we went back to church at 5:30p.  Well, tonight was the Harvest America event and what a time of worship!  We had lots of precious visitors and it was just blessed in there...the Holy Spirit was thick and I am just so thankful!  Then we leave and we get home.  Right before we get out of the car, my 16 year old son, Lincoln, says, "Mom, can I talk to you for a minute?" I said, "Sure".  He opens up my car door and leans in and says in the sweetest, mildest manner, "Mama, I want to get baptized again.."  I said, "Linc, you can be, but can I ask why?"  He said, "Well, you know, Mom, I don't feel like it stuck. When I went to the front before, it was because other people were but God has been working on me and I need it to stick to this time, so I need to do it over."  WHAM!!! Glory! So, I said, "Linc, lets pray about giving your heart to the Lord."  We did and that sweet giant said that prayer with conviction and confidence that Lord was saving him.  I had NEVER heard him pray before.  He would always refuse but not tonight!!  He gladly repeated that prayer with me.  Then afterwards, he said, "Mama, I don't know how the Lord is going to use me but I am thinking youth minister.  I am not sure but I do know I will go study God at college when I get out of school."  WHAM! Glory! He came in and boldly walked in there to explain to Eric that he gave his heart and life to the Lord and while he was telling that story, he just buried his head in his hands and wept.  He is looking forward to being baptized.  I am looking forward to eternity with my baby boy!  WHAM! Glory!

 

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life."  John 3:16 



O' Happy Day!!!

 

 

I have to say that when I got up this morning, I didn't get up on the right side of the bed.  I feel like I am getting sick, I was tired and it was early.  Then I go pick up my brother, Jason.  Now if anyone has ever met him in the morning time, they will know that he is not going to be happy first thing in the morning unless you are smiling and fired up or you are so aggravated you could spit!!  So, this morning was no different and I think I mentioned that I haven't felt the greatest all day.. we started down the road and turned on Jesus Culture and was listening to some awesome worship music.  The further we rode on our journey, the harder it got for me to waller in that miserableness.. Something kept saying to me, "You love youth!! You love Chris Allen and his sister, Merrie! You love learning! You LOVE this guy in this car!  You LOVE, LOVE Me!!!"  Then that same One said something along the lines of, "You are seriously going to squander this opportunity to have a good time worshiping me?  You are going to throw away all I have for you today with a bad attitude?  You are going to miss this chance to love and have fun with one of your favorite people?"  See, Jay didn't know in all his "pumping up" he was doing that he also had a "Helper" in changing the perspective I had.  The best decision I made today was to just worship God for a few minutes and let Him work on my ugliness.  Then once He got that out of the way, He could bless me...like He wanted to do all along!!  See, we get in the way of what God has for us a lot of times.. I know I do on a regular basis.  He is waiting to just show you how much His love for you is but instead of giving in to His precious ways of chiseling away the flesh, we hang on to it and are miserable in it. 

 

 

I have to tell you I was so blessed today!  God fired up my heart even more for youth..He gave Jay and I some great ideas.  Merrie has a way of telling stories about kids she has invested her life in and God has sent her way that just breaks your heart down for their generation..I seriously don't think I have ever been around her that I don't cry!  Today, she told one story about "The Lifter of Our Head".  I can't even say that without crying, or type it for that matter.  See, I lived a life that led to some times of shame and unworthiness.  I lived a while thinking that there wasn't anything much good in this life, except my kids and family.  I spent many days being alone, locked up in a world of walls, protecting me from anymore hurt.  Then one day, because that sweet guy in my car is so aggravating that he doesn't hush or give up, I found "The Lifter Of My Head".  I no longer dodge people.  I have found that if my heart gets hurt, Jesus heals.  I have found the source of Truth and therefore, I can trust again.  I won't ever forget the time Anna McClure and I put on that women's conference and I kept asking the Lord what I would tell the women..He gave me the perfect Scripture that morning about no longer wearing sackcloth.  You see, sackcloth was worn during mourning.  I was no longer in mourning and as I read that out loud to those women, I don't know if they heard me or not because I was crying so hard that I couldn't breathe but I know the One heard me and He knew how much I loved Him for removing that sackcloth.  Then at Women of Joy this year, Christy Nockels got up and sang Wonderful.  One part of that song says, "I was hopeless and you lifted up my head to sing for joy."  I will never forget hearing it for the first time that night..I cried in pure worship..I felt freedom that night..  Then today, when she talked about "The Lifter of My Head", I was overcome because that is who He is to me.. He is The Lifter of My Head.  I thank God, that He doesn't stop lifting my head.  See, if He hadn't lifted my head out of the mess I had made of my morning today, then I would've missed that sweet guy that waited on me to walk to break out sessions with. I would have missed out on the excitement we had on the way home, as we talked about how to be more intentional in the life of these youth.  I would have missed the phone call that same guy gave me tonight to come watch the Greg Laurie kick off, where we watched the baseball field they are at be flooded in the 1000s of decisions to turn their lives over for Christ.  See I didn't deserve that chance this morning to have a God-day, instead of a Lori-day but that is what kind of God my Father is.. His grace is sufficient and His mercies are new everyday!!

 

"But you are a shield around me, O Lord; You bestow glory on me and lift up my head." Psalm 3:3

Finally ...

I have felt like the Lord has said to me a million times to write.. I kept saying, "How, Lord?"  "What way, Lord?" I felt like He was telling me that He had gifted me with an ability I wasn't using and I just couldn't imagine what direction to go with it.. In my rambling on Facebook, I have been so blessed by people just walking up to me and saying, "I read your posts!"  They have no idea what it means to me.. Not for my glory because all I do is expose what the Lord has done in my life, hoping to bring glory to His Kingdom.. But He uses it for His glory and I am so blessed to know that I can offer something to the glory of  Jesus and that my life can be used to serve.  Then if it blesses someone else's life, everything I go through is worth it.  He is worthy to praise!! 

When God sent me to this earth, He gave me to a wonderful family... I had aunts that invested graciously in my life.  I grew up listening to their beautiful voices being lifted up for the Lord.  I can remember being a small girl and getting so excited when one of them would sing.  I don't think I loved another person on Earth's voices more than theirs.  Their offerings to the Lord taught me to give of my talents to Him as well.  Then I had grandparents that taught me so many things... way too many to ever list.  Grandma was my second mama and being known as "Grandma's Girl" was not a title I took lightly.  I still am "Grandma's Girl", thank you, Lord.. She served as treasurer and still does, as far as I know, at Silver Creek Baptist church my whole life.  She also was secretary at Mill Spring Elementary, where I attended elementary school.  I remember one time, this girl was mad at my grandma for something simple and she said she didn't like my grandma..I cried and cried..I couldn't imagine anyone not liking her..I mean, she is "Grandma" and who doesn't like "Grandma".  This precious, little woman has loved me through hard times I didn't know that I would get through.  She was there when the walls were falling down around me.. What a blessing to have learned about  family bonds, love, serving the Lord, good cornbread, loving Jesus, hard work and too much to list from her.. Then my grandpa..what a man!  What a saint.. Precious man.. He has been the example of male leadership through the generations.. When I was a little girl, he would walk us down through the pastures and take us by the hand and guide us into a big cow patty because he could see them coming and we couldn't.  He would just laugh.. but come anyone needing anything, He is there.. and my mama..she is a warrior.. I watched her fight through  a lot of hard years for us kids.. although she is the definition of strength, she was the most understanding, non-judgmental person in the world. When we were little, we were poor as dirt.. but I thought I was rich.. I will never forget her telling me we weren't.  You know why I thought we were rich?  Because our riches aren't counted in money..they are counted in blessings..I was so blessed, I thought growing up I was rich. And although she told me we weren't, now I know I was all along.. 

Today, I am richer than I have ever been.. God has given me a new name in Heaven.  Four years ago, I joined His family.. The most blessed day of my life. When I seek His face, He never hides from me.  This journey I have been on, called "My Life" has pointed me towards the One who has pursued my heart.  He picked that family out for me.. He knew what was perfect for me.  He is perfect for me.. 

"The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever..." Psalm 138:8